Memories, so hard to stop them flooding my mind when I am trying to sleep at night. I try to quiet their persistent noise in my head with telling myself to relax. Fortunately, for myself, I have discovered the benefit of using “white noise” which in my case is a fan that I switch on at night to help me sleep on those “my brain won’t stop thinking nights.
Sadly, being able to sleep and stop the thoughts is not so easy for many of our troops. Here is an article that addresses that issue.
I know first hand how a loved ones personality can change after a TBI. It is like they are different, yet the same. Strangely enough you can see the difference in their eyes as well as their mannerisms. Yet, should someone who has experienced TBI and suffers from depression be given anti-depressants? Should they see a doctor while taking these medication? Should they be receiving counseling as well?
Here is advice about TBI and meds by Dr. Brian Greenwald.
Having a husband leave once again for deployment is tough. However, as Ellie Kay writes in her July 2014 blog entitled, Deployments and Random Acts of Emotion, having your son or daughter enlisting and being deployed sets off an avalanche of emotion and sometimes heartache. Ellie writes, “… sending a family member away to a deployment is a different situation entirely and even though I may not sob buckets of tears, these deep seeded emotions have a way of bubbling to the surface like the tar in the La Brea Tar Pits.” Click here to read more from Ellie’s blog.
The Wounded Warrior Project is a non-profit geared
to serve veterans/service members who incurred a physical or mental injury, illness, or wound(s) , co-incident to their military service (and their families) on or after September 11, 2001.
The purpose of the Wounded Warrior Project as stated on their website is:”To help warriors make the most of their benefits and successfully transition to life after injury, the Wounded Warrior Project provides warriors with the tools they need to become financially secure.”
Unlike traditional models of veterans’ services the Wounded Warrior Project identifies the warrior’s individual needs and provides economic empowerment. The Wounded Warrior’s Project Benefits Service team ensures that warriors and their families have information and access to government benefits, as well as a full range of programs and the community resources necessary for a successful transition for the warrior (and his/her family) to life after injury.
A key part of the Wounded Warrior Project: to advise warriors of their benefits, along with information on how to access those services through the Department of Defense (DOD) and Department of Veterans Affairs (VA).
It seems the VA is taking seriously the dramatic increase of PSTD in both soldiers/warriors/veteran in the field and at home. Here is an excerpt from the an blog written by Elspeth Cameron Ritchie entitled, “The Importance of Instilling Hope. ”
The 4th Annual Department of Defense-VA suicide-prevention conference was a big deal here in the capital last week, with three days of presentations by top officials from the Pentagon and the Departments of Veterans Affairs and Health and Human Services. I put together the first military suicide-prevention conference, back in 2002. A decade ago, it was done on a shoestring budget (in other words, none), at the Marine Corps’ Henderson Hall near the Pentagon. It had about 100 attendees (some complained there was no coffee!). The keynoter was Kay Redfield Jamison, a great speaker and author of Night Falls Fast,on suicide, and numerous others that delve into the mind.
Since then the military conference has grown, merged with the VA, and routinely draws over 1,000 people to one of downtown Washington, D.C.’s biggest hotels. I have actually grown a little cynical about the conference over the last 10 years.
All this effort and money, but the suicide rate in the military grows every year – despite the Army and DoD task forces.
However I was impressed by this last conference, and want to share a few highlights.
- Navy-Marine Corps Suicide Prevention, PTSD Conference Underway at San Diego Town & Country Resort (theveteransdisabilitylawfirm.com)
- Why Is the UK’s PTSD Rate So Much Lower Than the U.S.’s? (battleland.blogs.time.com)
- PTSD and Suicide Risk (everydayhealth.com)
- PTSD Military And Veterans Should Receive Purple Hearts, NAMI Urges (medicalnewstoday.com)
Margo was ecstatic. Her soldier/warrior husband, Dean had returned from Afghanistan safe and sound. Her family and friends are greeted him at the airport with signs welcoming him home. There was a flurry of hugs, tears, laughter and relief from everyone, most especially Margo. Dean was home, he looked wonderful, happy and a bit bewildered. She was eager to get him home, but was unsure of herself as he had been gone for almost a year, maybe he had changed. Dean was her hero, her husband, her one true love and she couldn’t wait to show him how she decorated their home in flags and flowers. She was proud of her soldier husband and was eager to show him off to her friends at the huge welcome home party she had planned for the coming weekend.
And yet, as they drove home together, Margo’s hand resting lightly upon his khaki-clad and muscular leg, she could feel that Dean’s tenseness. Wasn’t he glad to be home, did he not love her any more? What was wrong?
The above scenario is not unique. A veteran (a soldier who has been in the armed forces for over 6 mos.) coming home from deployment is understandably, a bit confused and disoriented. He or she has been in an environment where they have had to rely on themselves and their fellow soldiers for support and survival. They have probably seen friends or acquaintances killed or wounded, perhaps right next to them. Their life for months has been of order and fairly predictable. Coming home can be for many a very big…culture shock.
I would recommend anyone who is a friend or loved one read this helpful article-> Ten Things You Should Know to Help Bring the OIF/OEF Veteran All the Way Home By Alison Lighthall, RN, MS (Former Captain in the US Army Nurse Corps) Founder, HAND2HAND CONTACT.
Here is a brief excerpt of her pdf article:
10. OIF stands for Operation Iraqi Freedom, also known as the Iraq War, and it began on March 20th, 2003. OEF stands for Operation Enduring Freedom and is a multinational military operation aimed at dismantling terrorist groups, mostly in Afghanistan. It officially commenced on Oct. 7, 2001 in response to the September 11th terrorist attacks;
9. Returning Service Members do not think of themselves as heroes, no matter how extraordinary their skills, courage, or actions may be. Their heroes are the ones still over there or coming home in a flag-draped boxes;
To read more, click (here) and it will take you to the HAND2HANDCONTACT.org webpage, scroll down halfway and click on the article “10 Things You Should Know About Today’s Veteran.
Other sites to visit:
Life will be different once the returning service person comes home. The Veteran may demand more of his wife’s for husband‘s time, alot more time. If so, the wife may well begin to resent this. Why? Perhaps now that their Veteran husband is home they find that they cannot spend time with the friends which were made during their soldier’s deployment.
Not surprisingly, spouses may begin to miss the special home-grown support network which were a big part of their life while their soldier was stationed overseas. These non-military relationships have the possibility of seriously challenging the foundation of their marriage.
Spouses, it is important to remember to take things slow with your Veteran and get to know each other again. Why not make special “date” nights to reacquaint with each other again….rekindle that spark that initially brought you both together. Give your Veteran space to readjust to the aspect of no longer living/working in a war zone. Perhaps sleeping in separate beds for a while, might be necessary. When in doubt, consult a professional familiar with military life.
Remember, you are both not the same as you were before he left. It will take time and patience to get to know and appreciate each other again.
- Making Date Night Sweeter One Bite at a Time (berries.com)